Thanksgiving is about to descend upon us – and I can’t wait!
Thanksgiving 2023 is going to be my fifteenth Thanksgiving. That's a lot of turkey we've scoffed over the years! Ever since The Fella and I became a couple, I’ve been celebrating Thanksgiving with him. It’s a very special time for us and even when we moved back to London for a few years, where Thanksgiving is non-existent, we still made a big deal of what had become one of my favourite holidays. And what makes it even more special, is that over the years our family and friends over in Britain have come to realize how important this time is to us, and all the messages we receive from them on that day, well - it means a lot. One year we got to celebrate with our friends in Edinburgh – and they loved it. It has definitely gone down as one of our most memorable Thanksgiving celebrations.
There was also the time I got to cook Thanksgiving dinner for eleven of us. It was interesting, and definitely an experience, but incredibly stressful! That was the most I've ever hosted and not one of my favourite Thanksgivings - though that was due to the difficult people we had the misfortune of hosting and nothing to do with the number of people present! Which is just as well because all across America, people are going "Eleven people? Is that all???"
But it's our first Thanksgiving together that is the most memorable and one that set the tone for all subsequent celebrations. I had arrived in America to surprise my then-boyfriend-now-husband and hadn't realised that it was Thanksgiving week. All I really knew about Thanksgiving was what I'd watched in movies and read in those young adult fiction series that I was so fond of (thank you Sweet Valley High and Roommates!) So while I had the jist of it, my knowledge about Thanksgiving celebrations was pretty limited.
The Man was delighted at my arrival and decided that our first Thanksgiving together was going to be a great one. But get this, despite being an American and growing up with this annual celebration, he didn't really know a great deal about Thanksgiving himself! He didn't really know what to do; how to celebrate it; what to prepare, or about the customs or traditions. But then it's not as though he ever hosted Thanksgiving in his life: just ate a huge dinner and played video games all day! After a bit of research (thank you, Google!) I understood that a traditional roast turkey dinner was served, and that most people settled down to watch football and A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving but I didn't know about anything else that was involved. And neither of us knew how to roast a turkey as neither of us had ever had to do that. But thankfully a few frantic phone calls to our mums sorted that out!
So after interrogating The Man about the dos and don’ts of Thanksgiving, he insisted that it really didn’t matter what the traditions were – we should work on creating our own ones. I thought it was a lovely idea. I also knew that it was his way of saying that he hadn’t the foggiest what Thanksgiving traditions were despite having celebrated Thanksgiving his whole life! So create our own traditions we did! Well of course at the time we didn't know that these were going to become our traditions, but over the years they've firmly taken root and now it's how we do Thanksgiving every year - otherwise it just doesn't feel like Thanksgiving. Though I’m very glad to say that our first ever Thanksgiving meal has not become one of our traditions or else we’d be eating roast turkey, raw carrots, stuffing and nothing else every year!
So as I prepare to celebrate my fifteenth Thanksgiving with the man who introduced me to it all, I take a look at all things that are typically 'us' and that we have to include every year so that it feels ‘Thanksgivingy.’
1. CHURCH IN THE MORNING
While I know that Thanksgiving isn't necessarily a religious celebration, for me, it’s very important to start Thanksgiving by going to a church service exactly as I would do Christmas morning. This what I did on my first Thanksgiving as a married woman and I've continued to do so. While The Man isn’t big on church, he does accompany me. It’s my chance to give thanks for all the good things that have happened that year and gives me time to reflect. I like that in America, there are special services for Thanksgiving, but as this holiday has no real significance in Britain, there is no special Thanksgiving mass in any of the churches but I still attended mass regardless.
2. PANCAKE BREAKFAST
Thanksgiving just isn’t Thanksgiving without a traditional breakfast of pancakes drenched in butter and maple syrup with bacon/sausage and eggs. You might wonder why we’d be tucking into a very filling breakfast when we’re going to be tucking into a gut-busting meal later on but when you come to number 5, you’ll understand why!
3. WINNER WINNER, CHICKEN DINNER!
Yes you read that correctly - chicken! While we have always celebrated with the traditional roast dinner just like everyone else does, it's only in more recent years that we made the switch from turkey to chicken. For many people, when it comes to Thanksgiving, the most traditional thing about it is the roast dinner which – unless you’re a vegetarian – just has to be turkey as tradition dictates. I remember for our first Thanksgiving in Britain, my mum insisted on cooking a leg of lamb because she absolutely hates turkey. Well, I’m sorry – I wasn’t having any of it! I told mum she could have some lamb for herself if that’s what she wanted but we were damn well having turkey! Of course I put it very politely or what was on the menu was going to be the least of my worries!
Since moving to New England, we often have wild turkeys wondering through our yard, and because we've catered to their needs, they seem to regard our yard as their home and we regard them as our pets. And once we saw the baby turkeys (or poults) well there was no way we could eat them after that. My mother-in-law said it's not the same kind of turkey. I replied we couldn't very well eat their cousins. So we don't!
So now we always have chicken (OK, true, maybe another cousin but we're not ready to down the stuffed marrow route just yet!) with all the trimmings including potatoes, stuffing, sweet potatoes and even Yorkshire pudding because let's face it - you can take the girl out of Britain... Cranberry sauce and green bean casserole usually gets left off the list unless one of our guests requests it. And you can bet your life biscuits and pumpkin pie will be on the menu.
Of course there’ll be a round of sandwiches the next day!
4. CHICKEN MUST BE TOPPED WITH BACON
I thought everyone wrapped the top of the turkey with bacon in order to keep it very moist - after all, no one likes dry turkey, do they? It's certainly something I consider a necessity. But it would seem that when I prepared Thanksgiving dinner in the States one year, many of The Man's family had never seen a turkey covered in bacon rashers before. Some even thought it was my own invention (I wish!) They thought it was the most awesome thing they'd ever seen, and before the turkey even made it on to the table, the bacon had already been devoured!
I continue to do the same thing these days but with chicken instead of turkey.
5. A VERY, VERY, LATE DINNER
This is a cross between a tradition and coincidence as try as I might, I can NEVER get dinner on the table at a time when most normal people would expect to eat. But then we’re not known for being a ‘normal’ household! From what I understand, most Americans have their traditional Thanksgiving meal between the hours of 1-3pm. Not in this house though!
I don’t know if it’s because of all the back-to-back movies we’re watching; the non-stop grazing that happens while we’re waiting for the main event, I don’t know why or how but dinner is never served before 6pm. In fact the year we were in Edinburgh with our friends, we were having such an awesome time that we didn’t serve dinner until 11pm! That’s right – 11pm!!! Although there was also the issue of a turkey that had not really defrosted... So by the time I eventually sat down to eat, it was after midnight and Thanksgiving was officially over.
So the moral of the story is that if you want to eat on time, Angel Noire's is not the place to be!
6. FAMILY MOVIE MARATHON
The Fella is a movie nut so if it’s just the family who are coming over, it’s not unusual to find us watching movies until the early hours of the following day. We only stop to call friends and relatives; The Fella takes a break to game (also his chance to chat to his bestie who lives in South Carolina) and of course to scoff dinner!
7. GAMES WITH FRIENDS
If we are having friends over, we know that they will not want to sit around watching movies the whole time. So The Fella will watch his beloved movies until our guests arrive and then it’s raucous party game time. They might be a bit old hat (not that that's a problem for me of course!) but charades and bingo always go down well and have proved to be an excellent ice-breaker with people who don’t know each other very well. By the time they’ve put on their coat to go home, they should (hopefully) have made a whole new bunch of friends.
8. DEATH AT A FUNERAL
This may seem like an odd choice but it started out as purely coincidental. I realised that for the first few years that we’d celebrated Thanksgiving together, we’d always watched Death At A Funeral. I’ve seen both the 2007 and 2010 versions which both star Peter Dinklage. Don’t ask me why but that’s always something that’s on the movie marathon list. So now I feel that it isn’t really Thanksgiving unless we watch this hilarious comedy film that never fails to have me in stitches even though I’ve seen it countless times now.
9. CANDLES
There’s nothing like candle light, and every Thanksgiving I make sure there are candles dotted around the place – especially beautifully scented candles. One of the things our friends in Edinburgh remembered about our Thanksgiving celebration was how gorgeous the place looked bathed in candlelight and the welcoming aroma that greeted them as they entered the house.
And we always have a candlelit dinner for Thanksgiving because there’s just something about that gentle, cosy glow and the warmth of the flickering candles as we’re all sat around the table. In fact, come to think of it, that might be another reason why we serve dinner so late in the evening as a candlelit dinner at 1pm just isn’t the same.
10. CHEESE BOARD
The first year we brought out a cheese platter, it was such a hit that I knew I had to do it again the following year, and now it's a tradition that's remained ever since, and often replaces lunch. Everyone enjoys nibbling on a selection of cheeses with crackers, mini sausages, apple slices, grapes and chutney in between chatting; mingling with other guests; playing charades, watching movies and so on, and grazing until near enough dinner time because as you all already know now - Thanksgiving dinner is always served late in this house!
11. I AM THANKFUL POEM
It was our first Thanksgiving as a married couple and we were living in the Pacific North-West when during the church service the priest read a beautiful poem that has stayed with me ever since. It’s a reminder to be thankful for the little things and to count your blessings – even if it may not seem like a blessing at the time. The poem is called I Am Thankful by a talented but Nancie J. Carmody. I like to read it every Thanksgiving:
I AM THANKFUL
I am thankful for…
The mess to clean up after a party because it means I have been surrounded by friends.
The taxes I pay because it means that I am employed.
The clothes that fit a little too snug because it means I have enough to eat.
My shadow that watches me work because it means I am out in the sunshine.
A lawn that needs mowing, windows that need cleaning and gutters that need fixing because it means I have a home.
The spot I find at the far end of the parking lot because it means I am capable of walking.
All the complaining I hear about our government because it means we have freedom of speech.
My huge heating bill because it means I am warm.
The lady behind me in church who sings off key because it means that I can hear.
The piles of laundry and ironing because it means my loved ones are nearby.
The alarm clock that goes off in the early morning hours because it means that I’m alive.
Weariness and aching muscles at the end of the day, because it means I have been productive.
Let’s be thankful – not only at Thanksgiving, but every day.
Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
Blog graphics: Angel Noire
